Three and a half years ago God gave me a promise. Now I’m not one of those people who hear clearly from God on a daily basis. For me it’s always a lot hazier than that. I might hear a sermon on a specific verse and read the same verse in a book later that day; I take that as God speaking to me. I might get a sudden sense of clarity in a situation, or a particular feeling of peace surrounding a struggle. Sometimes, like John Wesley, ‘my heart is strangely warmed’.
But three and a half years ago I sat in my garden, praying about the book I had spent the last three years writing. At that time I had been searching for a publisher for a few months. When I was writing “The Chains of Gwyndorr,” I had the naïve notion that once I had completed it, I would contact a few publishers and one of them would snap it up. Now disillusionment was beginning to set in. Few of the query letters I sent out even got a response. Those that did always included phrases like ‘…does not suit our purposes…’ or ‘…am unable to consider…’
But that day God spoke to me. Not in an audible way, mind you. Still, His words pressed into my heart in a way I had never experienced before. And His words were this: I will bring down the walls. Jericho came to mind, with its impenetrable walls, cracking and crumbling to the ground at God’s command.
As time passed, I clung to those words. There were days I believed them more strongly than others. Some days I doubted however, wondering if I had truly heard from God or if it was just something I had conjured in my own mind. Other days I debated whether I had understood God correctly. Did He perhaps mean different walls, rather than the impassable publishing walls that I kept battering up against?
Yet, I also began to sense a quiet shifting in my life. Opportunities to attend a South African writing conference, which led me on to the 2012 LittWorld Christian Publishing conference in Kenya. The wonderful (and terrifying) opportunity to speak to a British publisher, who read several chapters of my book and gave me two pages of insightful suggestions, which I incorporated into an intensive re-write. Writer, Robin Jones Gunn, putting me in touch with a publisher. A literary agent who agreed to take me on as a client.
Yes! Things were finally moving and I was excited…until they ground to a halt again, that is. The publisher Robin put me in touch with sold his publishing house. The silence and rejection from publishers resumed. My literary agent resigned from the agency. I was back where I began, except that I had run out of doors to knock on. Still God’s words echoed through my mind: I will bring down the walls.
And it had never seemed less likely.
I wish I could say that I waited on God with serenity and patience; most of the time I didn’t. Yet, strange as it sounds, I did begin to gain some appreciation that God was withholding what I longed for so much. There was another shift taking place now, deeper and far more significant than before—a shift in my heart. I was learning that God had to be the centre of my life, that my book must not be an idol to me. I came to a point of surrender. If a publishing contract was not to be, I would trust that God knew best and accept His will. I realised too, that I simply had to write, whether my words were published or not. Writing filled me with joy, much like Eric Liddell said about running in ‘Chariots of Fire’: ‘God made me fast. And when I run, I feel His pleasure.” I was also spurred on to self-publish my book “Encounters”.
Then, on the 23rd of April 2015, the walls finally cracked, teetered and imploded into dust. I opened an email from Steve Laube at Enclave Publishing. It read:
“If you are still waiting then I would like to make an offer to you to publish with Enclave Publishing”.
Just like that God had fulfilled His promise. God had brought down the walls.
I cannot even begin to express the excitement of that moment. But more than any other emotion, I felt a sense of awe. Awe at the power of a God who can do the impossible with such ease. Awe at the faithfulness of a God who fulfils every promise He makes. Awe that I—so undeserving—would find favour with Him and that He would consider my books something He could use to touch lives.
So today I want to encourage each of you: cling! Cling to God and to every promise of the powerful and faithful Promise-Keeper, even when you feel hopeless and forgotten. He never forgets you or the promises He has made.
Read the 2nd part of my journey: Journey to Publication – Deadlines and Insecurity
I wrote this Psalm on the day I received the news of my contract:
To Him be the glory. Indeed Joan He did not forget you, and thank you for giving Him the centre stage. May doors be swung open and walls torn down! Amen
So exciting Joan.
Can’t wait to have my own signed copy!!!
Our God is faithful, faithful, faithful!
Oh Joan you are worthy my friend. Worthy of this break through. I am so very happy that this has finally come through for you. I trust the path ahead will be a smooth one but no doubt many more tests and trials ahead for you. God bless you
Joan, what encouragement, and witness to God’s faithfulness. THanks for persevering!
That is so inspiring. My heart so resonates with your experience. It is so easy to take our eyes off God and make our attempts our idol. I will just cling to God.
Thank you Joan. I sooo needed that encouragement and reminder of a faithful God. Thank you that you share your wonderful gift of writing with us and to God’s glory.
Congratulations and we are all waiting in anticipation for your Trilogy.
Thank you Allen. You may have noticed that your writing conference was the very first shift that led me to this point – thank you so much.
Your words, once again, turn our heart to Him in praise! Thank you for encouraging me again. xx
John shared your good news with me, and I praise the Lord for your successful journey. Yours, once again, is proof that those who don’t give up on their writings and publisher-search but pursue them vigorously will eventually arrive at a place meant for them.
Congratulations, Joanna, and may the years ahead bring more successes.
I am delighted for you, Joan. I am so glad that others will get to read what you write. Your voice needs to be heard:-).
Thanks Lawrence, also for your input on my manuscript.
Oh my word! What an encouraging message from you! I LOVE your writing – anything you write – I so appreciate reading your thoughts, feelings and testimony. I will hold on to what you have given us in your Psalm as well. All the best and I too, am looking forward to my autographed copy of your book. Take care and thank you for sharing your wonderful talent with us on this Blog.
Thank you for your consistent support, Roma! I appreciate you.
My dearest sister, “walls breaking” has been a constant theme in my journey. Reading that and your sense of his promise and reassuring hand turned it into a wailing wall for me. God is in it Joan. I weep for you. Truly. It is a very precious thing you are going through but God is in it. I also never heard audible shouts from heaven, but what eventually moved Elijah was an almost imperceptible whisper, a warming of his heart. The sheep know the shepherd’s voice. Follow that. He will lead you to the time and place that is in his plan, and timing in God is the difference between a book and a message of God.
A very encouraging story. I am also waiting…for publishers that don’t answer… I do believe that God is in control. There has been a subtle shift in my thinking over the past year or so of waiting as well, toward using my writing more intentionally for God’s glory. Up to now I have submitted to secular publishers, even though my stories have Christian themes. I recently submitted it to Enclave as well. They may not want it (I’m still within the three-month submission window) and I may end up self publishing, but either way I will trust that God has a plan for me and I will keep on writing because it is where I find God. I look forward to reading your books. I’m glad I found your website. 🙂
I’m greatly encouraged Joan. Thank you. I’m now tempted to ignore the lurking fears and break out. I’m contemplating letting the tip of my toe touch the still water before taking a dip. let’s see what happens.